Hunchback of Downing St

Midas powers in reverse: Everything George Osborne touches turns to shit. So pity that door knocker

Berejiklian smells the people

 

Tuck your Berejiklian shirts in

you bunch of O'Farrells

Get out and Abbott, you Bairds

How humilaiting to be seen on public transport!

It's a bitter pill for Gladys to swallow. Standards of deportment and grooming must be maintained

 

The uniform must be spotless. Maintain the brand. Passengers fingernails are to be inspected...

Bonking Boris Bankster better not come to town, he'll be sent home to comb his hair

Tony Abbott learns to read

 

Tony, this is a briefing document. You may remember these from your time as a federal minister.

Note for Julie Bishop. You should hang out with Tony more often: you seem sane and educated by comparison

pussy riot

 

Eh Putinator, take a kick in the arse "in the name of god"

Chatbot Mike McFaul laughs at his discomfort. Putin can see him!

"That's below the belt, attacked by girls. This is worse the the beatle$"

He confers with Russian Olympic officials in London. "I like to wrestle tigers. With judo throw I can land these foreign-backed witches in gulag. I call for leniency. Minimum term is two years"

But how exorcise that chatbot, for that we must wait and see

Feather duster a rooster again

 

Sick of bush-walking and doing Abraham Lincoln pastiches on the standup circuit former NSW premier Bob Carr has got himself a new job as minister for US interests in the ALP with special responsibility for delivering Julian Assange

Meanwhile Assange is settling into solitary confinement at the Ecuadorian embassy in Knightsbridge

 

Facts are sacred and my lawyer is naked

That's no Kenny Everett hand...

That's the Bain strangling hand

Ryan: No taxes for deserving corporate persons

Mitt 'Romnoid' Romney : I pledge to be a deserving corporate person

Malcolm Turnbull waits, and salivates

 

 Australia would have to be the only country going which would seriously consider a merchant banker as a sober alternative Prime Minister. 5 years into the financial crisis. We have a hairy monk to thank for that. Savonarola in budgie smugglers

But a merchant banker is a merchant banker. it will be interesting to watch for liberal policy to fix the NBN for corporate and financial sector profit over public interest. And somehow protecting Foxtel's  sports cartel. 

Whatever contortions are required

 

monetizing existence is rewarding... fruit of the pin-stripe plant, an invasive weed

More merchandise

For devotees of the Socialist pantheon, we introduce the all-new Babushka Buddha series of Latin American revolutionary leaders. Opening Hugo Chavez reveals Fidel Castro - with complimentary cigar. Peel him away to find Che Guevara. Next is Allende - imagine Kissinger bombing his palace.  Then comes Evo Morales in a cornbread headdress. Inside them all, long-necked Simon Bolivar, wearing an angular military hat

A big shout out to all my money

 

Whether hot and anonymous, or relaxing in tax havens: Mitt Romney dreams of a plutocratic orgy in Washington

Trust me, I worked for Goldman Sachs

Mario Draghi takes Gordon Brown Pudding for a walk

Bullingdon boys at the Olympic

Check the merchandise! Free Boris Bankster with every happy meal.

Or, for those who come second, Lord Dave Snooty, Cameron of the (British Virgin) Isles

George Osborne reminisces:  When I was at school I wore a necklace of Bob the Builder dolls to give me power over those other idiots. To those ambitious schoolboys out there I would suggest - a string of Boris Banksters adorning your throat will take you far...