"you fired": pre-game entertainment

 

 A new gladiatorial event at the olympics: presidential campaigning

 

Kevin Costner as Mitt Romney. Who else could play him? Twin talents for epic disaster

Lieutenant Minnie to the bridge : Kim Jong-Uhuru takes command

Aboard the Great Leader Enterprise Kim Jong-Un purges the geriatric generals and promotes Minnie Mouse to head of the army, and Dumbo is to be interior minister

face of a banker: Lord HSBC. British minister for trade

 

Money laundering is a nice little earner. Making drugs illegal is a great spur to capital accumulation

The Pope markets his incontinence - perhaps by mistake

More evidence that satire has been overtaken by events

If you bankers descend into theft, debauchery and excess, don't leave me out of it!

German satire magazine 'Titanic' took the piss out of the pope, showing him 'having spilled a fanta' onto his cassock while celebrating the discovery of the source of leaks threatening the dark secrets of papal banking.

Now the pope has sued the magazine for libel, ensuring that der Spiegel picked the story up internationally. Is the continence of the Pope an article of doctrine(ie subject to Papal infallibility)? Did God have a brainfart?

According to Benedict, the Pope can hold his piss, and that's official. Those making claims to the contrary will be excommunicated.

Hilary Clinton theatrical mask

No 1: wide-eyed exasperation - "you're not following the script buddy"

The bankers pout = a consortium of octopuses

 

Bob Diamond, the face of the octopus

Dave's Gherkin, scene 2

Some fellow on the trading floor dropped his trousers for a bottle of Bollinger, but we'll soon get to the bottom of that (BOOM BOOM)

 

Sir Michael Agius, pouting on behalf of the Barclays board

It was some rogue trader what done it, but someone must show responsibility, so why don't I resign for a day and then resume my chair.

 

A phone call to Tucker, muddy the waters...

We'll have to throw Bob under the bus I'm afraid.

trust me, I'm from the Bank of England.

 

Call in independent director Sir Michael Rake(I'm not making this up). Looks like a wonderful chap, and wonderfully independent of course

Next up, George Osborne gets spanked, but will he enjoy it?

Geopolitical handshake

 

Barack Obama and Hu Jintao

There be monsters - at the Liberal conference

It's a strange world where you find yourself agreeing with Clive Palmer, up to a point

 

Clive's deadset against any more lobbyists in politics. There's plenty of billionaires whose direct input is available. 

Look who he's up against, Santa(to himself) Santoro. Another shape-shifting lizard from the Queensland LNP. What's in the water up there?

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What's a conflict of interest? We're all mates around here

 

Alexander Downer,  foreign minister when the AWB kickback scam was on, and Reserve bank subsidiaries were bribing foreign officials, such as the head of Vietnam's secret police

After negotiating cars with Prince Jefri of Brunei, and negotiating peace on Cyprus(fruitlessly in both cases, but not before pissing everyone off),  A Downer picked up nice gig as a Lib vice-President. He's a director of the privatised spooks at Hakluyt(now famous for their employment of the guy whose murder brought Bo Xilai down). Perhaps they can explain his old habit of quoting Dick Cheney and Don Rumsfeld in advance


Locally he's got a lobbying company with (ex-Labor Senator) Nick Bolkus and the hubbie of (ex-Democrat Senator) Natasha Stott-Despoja. How cute, how cosy!

Tony Abbott is outside with his pan pipes, waiting for J-Liar, and the full moon

If you do find yourself agreeing with Clive, remember he's a prototype Chinese chatbot with colourful views programmable on timeshare. So the feeling will probably pass